I’m the first to admit that I’m not the world’s biggest fan of Valentine’s Day. A day that Hallmark Cards tells you to be romantic doesn’t exactly strike me as romantic, but despite that there are still a few things that Valentine’s Day can teach us about birth. It’s not a coincidence that some hypnobirthing teachers say you should give birth in the same environment the baby was made!

1.       Low lighting, fairy lights and candles

One of the key hormones in childbirth is oxytocin, which is commonly known as the shy hormone. It thrives in cosy environments that provide a sense of privacy and safety. It is released in response to feelings of safety and security and it’s the hormone that is in charge of our contractions so you want as much as possible of it in labour. Whilst it may not be practical to use actual candles when you’re in labour (especially if you’re at the hospital), battery operated candles will provide a similar atmosphere and who doesn’t love some fairy lights?

2.       Smells

If we’re talking about Valentine’s Day, the kinds of smell you might think of are your massage oils or scented candles. We’ve talked about the practicalities of candles above and you do have to be careful with massage oils during pregnancy and childbirth however, we can still take something from this! Smells are closely linked to memory and emotion so certain smells will trigger the release of oxytocin. Maybe you can bring your favourite candle to hospital to sniff (even if you can’t light it) or maybe you have a favourite pillow spray that you can take to hospital with you.

3.       Massage

Whilst we on the subject of massage oils, massage can play a really important role in childbirth and there are a few different reasons for this. Firstly, and perhaps most obviously, it will help relieve pain. Secondly, if you practise massage techniques with your birth partner before labour, then during labour, massage will trigger those feelings of calmness and relaxation and therefore help increase your levels of oxytocin. Finally, your brain can only focus on one session at a time, so if you are focusing on a lovely massage, you are less likely to notice any other sensations happening in your body. We talk more on my courses about massage techniques that you can use in labour.

4.       Blindfolds (or eye masks)

For the purpose of childbirth, eye masks probably sound less kinky but it really depends what you’ve got to hand! If you are having a homebirth, this one may not be so applicable but for a hospital birth where you want to block out the ward or need to transfer in a car, an eye mask could be really useful! It will help you to block out the bright lights of the ward or queues of undesirable traffic and keep those oxytocin levels flowing. A lot of women find that labour can slow down on the way to hospital. This is because it can be a stressful experience but an eye mask is one way that you can block things out to hopefully keep things going.

5.       Noise cancelling headphones

Another one for the kinkier amongst you… And if you’ve ever read Fifty Shades of Grey  then you’ll know what I’m talking about. For much the same reason as the eye mask, noise cancelling headphones can be invaluable in labour. If you’re a regular reader of my blog, you may have read about the birth partner playing a shooting game on the ward where I was being induced and that’s not going to help anyone’s oxytocin! But even at home if you need to block out children or the building work over the road, a pair of noise cancelling headphones is a labour must-have to help keep you in your own little oxytocin-fuelled world.

6.       Sex!

You’ll either be dead-set against this idea or willing to do just about anything to get the baby out. But sex (of any kind) can be really helpful to get labour going for a couple of different reasons. Firstly semen contains prostaglandins known to help soften the cervix, helping it to prepare for labour and facilitate dilation. Sex also triggers the release of that lovely oxytocin that’s essential to bring on contractions. Sex during pregnancy is safe as long as you have not been told otherwise by your healthcare providers. I fully appreciate that this idea isn’t for everyone but if you’re feeling up for it, then it can have benefits.